Self-Sufficient+Some

I am feeling somewhat emotional right now. Almost any emotion-pulling scene I see on TV or hear about from a person makes me want to break out in tears. Most of this, I believe, comes from just watching a new movie titled, “The Blindside” with Sandra Bullock. She is a wonderful actress, one of my favorites. Anyway, the movie was touching and was based on the story of a boy named Michael Oher who was a homeless youth but was taken in by this family who provided him with shelter and the means to continue in his schooling. He eventually joined the football team, and the family helped him get his grades up and now he’s a pro-athlete. Anyway, I’m not a worshipper of sports, as anyone who knows me already knows, but the story was touching, and I realize that I am now a mother, maybe not as “old” as the mother in the movie, I only have a toddler son, but I believe that everyday I can find opportunities to do good in someone else’s life beyond my own. The hard part is going out and dedicating that time. And, even as I sit here I realize that I don’t even need to go outside of my apartment to do that. I have a son, a precious little boy (see I’m about to cry already), who is living with me now and I’m the one who has the opportunity to raise him, and raise him well. And on top of it all, I have the gospel. I know eternal truths. I know God, and I have seen blessings upon blessings my entire life that I know are entirely because of our Heavenly Father. But, the fact of the matter, is it isn’t all for me. He blesses me. These blessings help me be self-sustained, and live comfortably with my little family. But, I believe God is helping me take care of myself, so that I can take care of others.

Wow. It’s like my fingers and mind were just itching to write. I have basically been swimming in a pool of these feelings for the past couple of hours. First, I watched “The Blindside”, and then I got on LDS.org and saw a “Mormon Message” video. One was a personal story of a member and her significant obstacle, but outlook in life as a mother being a divine calling. The other was Elder Holland’s profound testimony of the Book of Mormon that he gave last October conference. Can I say, “Wow!”? I still need to record my testimony of the Book of Mormon as well as answer a few other questions to fulfill that project in my Personal Progress since I recently finished reading it.

On a different note, I was following up on Dr. Phil’s website that got me started on this train of thought of being self-sufficient, and of being a good mother. I watched a show yesterday on Dr. Phil about mothers who really don’t have proper tools to be a good parent, or handler of their emotions. This abuse is wide-spread I’m sure, and I have had multiple times where I have decided that this is what I want to do when I go back to school. I want to take part in a daycare system that teaches children, like any daycare might, because I want children to have a fighting chance and opportunity in learning basics like reading and writing. And I want them to feel loved, appreciated, and safe. On the flip side, I want to take part in helping parents learn proper parenting techniques, similar to the class Richard and I were involved in. What a great opportunity that was for us. But, some parents don’t even know it is out there, or they think of it as therapy (negative association) or not as something that is beneficial. Anyway, I don’t know. I probably don’t even have to go back to school to volunteer with programs like this. But, having a degree under my belt would be a nice thing.

Well, Michael just woke up. We both still smell like chlorine from our swimming lesson early this afternoon. The water was cold. Michael belted out a loud scream when we first stepped in; kinda scared the one-year olds. But he warmed up and even hung onto the wall by himself. He’s a good boy.